Why Do Some Hot Women Date Fat Guys

The Dating Nerd is really a shadowy figure whose whereabouts and identifying details remain unknown. What we can say for certain is that he is actually, excellent at dating. He’s been on more dates than it is possible to shake an extended bar tab at, and he’s here to greatly help the common guy step his dating game up a notch – or several.
The Question
Hi Dating Nerd,
This hot girl I understand (let’s call her Nadine) just started dating this fat guy. Nothing like a dad bod – like, a legitimately fat guy. She’s this stunning babe that I am pining over for months now and she rebuffs me and jumps during intercourse with this particular fat slob. What the hell has been that? I’m not handsome but I tidy up nice and more often than not. What the hell does he have that I don’t?
– Not Hot, HOWEVER, NOT Fat
The Answer
Hi Not Fat,
Well, for starters, some women are simply, because the old frat boy saying goes, chubby chasers. Remember that female tastes are as diverse and unconventional as male tastes. Some women prefer to kiss stinky feet. Some women like concocting bondage fantasies with men in luchador masks. Have I ever told you about this corporate lawyer who tried to obtain me to screw a hot dog bun? No? OK, well, perhaps that is clearly a story for another time.
But I assume that isn’t what you’re discussing – you’re wondering why this fat guy has were able to land a stone cold stunner with, so far as it is possible to tell, a mostly mainstream taste in dudes. In the end, you’re a lot more attractive than him – aren’t you? And, being you are more physically fit, it is possible to probably have more done between the sheets, right?
Well, you could be wrong. See, that is just another little bit of evidence that points towards a reasonably obvious conclusion, that is this: Probably the most attractive male trait is confidence. Basically the rest is secondary.
Reader, without a doubt about two men I understand – let’s call them Jerry and Terry. One’s a chump, another isn’t.
Jerry, on paper, ought to be absolutely drowning in female attention. He’s tall, blue eyed, slim, and built. He’s a model, except real, and heterosexual. He’s got the whole wardrobe worked out, the beautiful apartment, the job that pays in the mid-six figures. Basically, he’s an accomplished, full-grown dude, of the kind that women are always complaining is nonexistent in the era of the millennial.
And he absolutely can’t get a girlfriend. Why? Because he has absolutely no self-esteem. There’s a reason he worked so hard to be the very image of an adult alpha male It’s because he was looking to cover up the truth that he’s lonely and desperate. But he hasn’t really made any psychological changes – just superficial ones.
The way he behaves with women, therefore, is cringeworthy. It’s so sad watching him do the same thing over and over. Basically, he falls in love with anyone who gives him the time of day. Go on two dates with him, and the poor guy’s all like, Come away with me, please change my life.” He’s the opposite of self-assured. I’m sure, also, he’s read books full of sex tips, but as soon as he actually gets in bed, he’s incredibly awkward, because he thinks, I better do everything exactly perfect,” and never just lets go and displays real passion.
OK. So, obviously, you don’t want to be that way. Probably, you want to be more like Terry.
Terry is fat. Not slightly – it’s not like he has a few extra pounds he could shave off at the gym. Nope. He’s huge. There’s just no way to put it politely.
But Terry is, well, Terry is a compelling person. The guy is a serial entrepreneur who just sold his third company. He’s not just a corporate drone – he’s effective. This can be a guy who walks into a room of rich investors and says, Give me money for this fantastic project” and they say, Yes.” Yesterday, we had lunch, and he told me, nonchalantly, that he’s going to go motorbiking in Myanmar, just for a low-key vacation. His life is as colorful as lives can get.
How did he get this way? Well, Terry grew up realizing that he didn’t have the opportunity with the favorite girls in senior high school. And, instead of spending all his time desiring sexy times with the Hollister-type blondes who have been so disgusted they didn’t even look at him, he surely got to work. Terry taught himself computers, and he taught himself business – and he learned he was a valuable individual, even though that wasn’t worth much on the sexual marketplace. In a short time, he was a funny, smart, charismatic person with an astounding list of achievements.
I bet you can view where that is going. Terry is drowning in female attention. Basically, every 90 days, he’s dating another jaw-dropping babe. Probably he’ll relax ultimately, but he’s not anxious about any of it. He doesn’t need women to create his life lively. And, due to this fact, his confidence is bulletproof. That’s exciting. People desire to be around that.
Also? EASILY were a betting man, I’d bet that Terry is most likely pretty great at sex. While he can’t accomplish any acrobatic stunts, he’s most likely not like, oh my God oh my God how do i do this secret G-spot move I read in a magazine.” He’s exactly like, here we have been, so let’s have a great time.” He’s not constantly considering how to impress women in every way, because he knows he’s a genuinely impressive person.
Now, the lesson here isn’t You need to gain a lot of weight and become a business owner.” The lesson is that being handsome is only going to get you up to now – you will need something extra. A thing that draws visitors to you. Confidence, passion, drive. You should be an actually interesting person.
You understand how people say Pretty girls certainly are a dime twelve?” Well, that principle applies to handsome men, aswell. There are a great number of super cute dullards on the market, who’ll get decked out all nice for a dinner date, and say nothing of any substance to a completely bored gorgeous person. They’ll obtain the dates, however they won’t go the length.
Also? Any hot girl can sleep with a hot guy anytime. This girl you’re discussing could just walk around any given dude in a bar and say, Hey, wanna look within my stamp collection?” Real confidence is a lot rarer than visual appearance.
So, if you are jealous of the fat dude, become more like him. Don’t assume that women will fall at the feet because they like that person. Ideally, you should are more interesting – look for a dream, and chase it. But if you cannot pull that off, at the very least play the role of confident. Fake it till you ensure it is – all confidence is fake confidence, initially. Moreover, don’t be determined by women for the self-esteem. Because that sort of neediness is endlessly unattractive. A lot more unattractive than a supplementary fifty pounds. Believe me.

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