What Shes Thinking When She Meets Your Parents

It’s without doubt that bringing your spouse home is the one of the primary actions you can take in a relationship. Let’s face it, either real way you cut it, it is a big deal. At the most, this person is intended by it may be the one,” and at the very least, that you think they could be. And that’s huge.
That’s also just about all that there is in common between your experience when it comes to meeting her folks , and your girlfriend’s when it comes to meeting yours. Because while the implication may seem like it’s the same, the process and pressure to prove oneself, for men and women, is completely different.
Let me explain. Typically, guys only buying the serious girl(s) in the first place. And she knows that. It may be 10 years because you last resulted in at a family group event with a woman on your arm; you’d like to dodge the awkward jokes and questions, and brave functions solo than actually bring along that waitress from the bar you frequent and risk giving her (and everybody else) the wrong idea. So, naturally, if and when she is the girl actually turning up on Mom and Dad’s doorstep, she kinda already knows she’s in. Because if she weren’t someone you thought was amazing and worthy of their approval, she simply wouldn’t be there.
That’s not so much the case for you, though – like, at all.
You see, a typical woman will bring home guys at all times. Well, not all the time, but every time she thinks she’s in love – and that is nearly every time. Her family has met all of them: the nice guys, the criminals, the lazy guys ,the too-dumb-for-yous, the too-busy-for-yous, and the just-not-good-enoughs. And the reason behind that is selecting the best guy because, for a woman, is really a group effort. She needs consensus. Why? Because nearly every woman has already established her heart stepped on by that asshole that everyone could tell was a jerk… except her. And because since that time, it may be hard on her behalf to trust her very own feelings again. It’s just like a protection mechanism, and only Mom once, Sis, Dad, the BFFs – and Tory even, the family dog – have approved, can things can go forward full-steam.
That said, it doesn’t mean that she doesn’t get nervous about meeting your family, it just means her head is in a slightly different place going into it. I’d say it’s less about proving herself to the fam than it is about proving them to her. Yes, she still wants to make a good first impression (read: eradicate any memory of every other girl that has ever come before her), and of course she’ll still need insight from you on the dos & dont’s of the house, and the what-not-to-talk-about-with-whoms so that she doesn’t end up in any awkward conversations, but the only thing she’s really worried about is not getting all the answers she needs from each person in your family.
If there’s one individual she really wants to meet most, it’s Mom. Not because she really wants to be best friends and obtain the within scoop (well, OK, yes, that), but because Mom may be the barometer she uses to guage what lengths her relationship with you’ll go. More specifically, your relationship together with your mom is what she’s considering.
See, the the tricky thing about moms and girlfriends is that they are essentially competing for exactly the same role. It isn’t that she really wants to mother you – no, she will surely keep that job – but she needs to know you are able to make enough space for both of you, and set boundaries, and your mom’s in a position to respect that. So while on the main one hand she’s hoping your mom’s mom (in-law) of her dreams – kind, loving, open, and nurturing, wanting to welcome her in to the family and share her life and memories with her – on another, she’s also hoping to note that Mom’s ready to release, and enable you to have a life independent of her. And for that matter, that you want that, too. If she doesn’t get that sense, then she might as well just skip mains and get right to dessert.
Dad is always the favorite of the bunch, because let’s be honest, he’s the easiest. He’s basically you in 30 years, so if you like her, she’s pretty confident she’s got him too. A sweet smile, some mild flirting, and a few wisecracks, and he’s on the team. Easy peasy. The only thing she’s looking out for with him is how well he treats your mom, because that’ll tell her a lot about what kind of man you are.
Siblings aren’t always easy, but they’re the ones she want to impress most. While parents are usually content with seeing their child happy, siblings needs more. They know all the dirt – on you, on her, on everything. And while they tend to be quite protective, that protection is extended once you’re in, so her only goal here is to bond as quickly as possible, and probably at your expense. Yes, there will be teasing. Just go with it.

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