How To Know IF YOU ARE WITHIN AN Unhealthy Relationship

Have fitness goals? It is possible to crush ’em. Desire to earn a promotion at the job? You got it. Desire to find the love you will ever have? It’s a bit more complicated.
Love doesn’t always seem sensible, and great deal of thought requires another person to reach your goals, the end game ‘s almost always from the control. But because the saying goes – the center wants what the center wants. This means too many people stay in long-term relationships with partners who aren’t necessarily right for them for a number of reasons – either attraction, comfortability or convenience. While you might be able to convince yourself to stay in an unhappy union for a while, as time passes, your patience and your energy level might dip.
A toxic twosome can infiltrate every area of your life, eventually making you into a person you might not even recognize. As couples therapist Dr. Sarah Schewitz says, “Your relationship has a major impact on your happiness and satisfaction with your life. Those in an unhappy relationship generally report a greater dissatisfaction with life in general when compared to those in happy relationships. Being in a bad relationship can lower your self-esteem, too.”
If you’re wondering if you should hit the road – or give it a go – take the advice of these trusted experts on how to navigate this difficult situation:
What’s Does An Unhealthy Relationship Look Like?
What initially attracts someone to someone else is an innate, personal and specific. And what keeps two people committed, intrigued and in love with one another varies greatly. However, Dr. Schewitz says there are few qualities all healthy relationships have in common.
For starters, they generally report feeling happy the majority of the time they’re together, they communicate effectively, they fight fair and there is a sincere level of trust. In the very best of situations, you are not completely reliant using one another either, but give one another the space it is advisable to grow as people outside the relationship.
However, an unhealthy relationship looks and feels quite different. Author and love expert Dr. Grant H. Brenner, MD, FAPA says these kinds of pairings are seen as a chronic negative feelings, too little mutuality, dissatisfaction, too little agreement, poor discussions plus much more.
“You might have even chronic feelings of sadness loneliness, contempt, unresolved conflict, and insufficient intimacy. The total amount of power is frequently skewed, with one partner exercising control on the other, being abusive or neglectful, and generally failing woefully to uphold give-and-take in the partnership – with another going alongside relationship patterns they don’t really like but have a problem getting away from or changing,” he explains.
Signs Your Relationship Is Unhealthy
Admitting your relationship isn’t right for you personally is not any easy task – but before you call it quits, take some cues to see if these signs remind you of one’s dynamic. Whilst every long-term love connection will ebb and flow, in the event that you constantly battle these issues, it may be an indicator to leave:
1. You Fight To Win
Maybe it really is you or your lover who subscribes to the stubborn belief they’re always right – or worse, you both. Here’s the reality though – even probably the most compatible of couples will bicker, however they will do what must be done to correct the ripple. Rather than caring about who’s in the proper and who’s in the incorrect, they work together to locate a solution and when needed, a compromise.
2. You Don’t Respect ONE ANOTHER
Consider your closest friend. In most cases, you’ll be in their corner whenever they need you (and even when they don’t). If they’re in trouble, you’ll be there with the bail money, and if they have an achievement, you’re the first to celebrate it wholeheartedly.
This same greatest fan mentality is also present in solid relationships – after all, you’re attracted to someone partly on how much you respect and value them as a human, not just a romantic partner. So when you lose that sense of pride in your partner – or they don’t have it in you? Dr. Schewitz says you’re tiptoeing into dangerous territory.
“One of the most damaging things to a relationship is something called contempt. Contempt is a basic loss of respect for your partner. Having contempt for your partner usually indicates you view him/her as less than you in some way – not as intelligent, hardworking, ethical, and so on. This may show up as hostility, sarcasm, and even eye rolling,” she explains.
3. You’re Not Functioning
And we mean this quite literally: when your relationship is to a point where it’s disrupting your life, it is time to raise an eyebrow and make a move.
Brenner explains when you’re down a dark path with your partner, you will likely begin to struggle with making decisions, taking care of children in case you have them, navigating finances – and the list goes on. It is because you’re no longer working as a team, but likely, trying to avoid what is growing between you.
4. You’re Lonely
It sounds counterintuitive to feel alone when you’re in a relationship, but Brenner says when you don’t feel supportive, loved or connected to your partner, it could be even more depressing than being single. When you’re wrapped up in bed with this person, or sitting next to them – does the distance seem to grow?
Or because they are never there, in person or emotionally, do you find yourself longing for them? In a healthy dynamic, couples stand by and with one another, providing a much-needed safety net from the rest of the world. If you don’t have this, it might be time reconsider and seek a safe harbor somewhere else.
5. Your Relationship Is Violent (In Any Way)
“If you or your partner are getting to the point where you are throwing things, breaking things, or pushing or hitting each other, your relationship is unhealthy. It’s almost impossible to have a healthy, equal partnership when one partner is afraid to speak up for fear that the fight will escalate to violence,” Dr. Schewitz says.

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